I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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