im holly from the hills drunk
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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