Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
