Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
