Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
