Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
