What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
