dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she looked like the before picture.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
