k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
