Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Sorry my hands just texted you
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
