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It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize