his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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