My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
