If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
