Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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