The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
