You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Randomize
