i'm lost and i look like a hooker
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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