We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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