You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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