Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Randomize
