I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
God, you're like boner-b-gone
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
