I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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