is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I smell like Dick and happiness
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
