I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
