saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
