You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
