i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Randomize
