it was like his penis was on wheels.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
