He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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