Dual....:-)
id be glad to
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
