i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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