Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
