I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
