I like my sex mixed with concussions.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize