i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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