But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
