Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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