The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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