fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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