sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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