So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
