Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize