I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
