My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
