Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
