Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
