and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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