Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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