I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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